You can cancel your massage or chiropractor appointment- Get in your car and drive really fast over those long edges of potholes. Don’t go into the really deeps ones, although it’s hard to avoid them at this point, but the string of smaller ones, where it gets the car vibrating, those can really make a difference on a sore back.
While you’re at it cancel your gym membership-Who needs to work out at the gym when every day you can head outside, pick up a shovel and push that snow off the driveway and sidewalk. You can burn from between 400-600 calories an hour!
You get to really support your local coffee joint-Living in Mid-Michigan it’s hard to avoid a giant Biggby billboard. This weather makes for the perfect opportunity to stop into your nearest shop, order your favorite drink and head off to work. If you have a Biggby card and it’s your birthday you even get a free one! This allows you to support a local business owner, which makes you feel really good inside. The warm coffee doesn’t hurt either.
You can act like a jerk and get away with it-I am pretty sure most of the Michigan residents (and probably the whole Mid-West & East Coast) are one snowball short of a maniacal outburst. We’re at the point where anger, hostility and aggression are at its peak. Of course you could try to counter it by being nice, but no one will hold it against you if you’re cranky.
You get to cuddle-Do you remember those super hot, summer days where you were so hot and sweaty you didn’t want anyone touching you? Yeah, me neither. Not this winter. I find myself cuddling up to all kinds of people and warm things. The other day I stood at the exit at Meijer extra long to enjoy the hot air that shoots down. I cuddle my kids, my husband, and people in the elevator. I’m at the stage where I’ll take warmth almost anywhere.
You don’t need to shave-Not your pits, your legs, your face, nothing. Why should you? Keep that hair as long as you want or need. My son refused a hair cut because he said it kept him warm. I hear ya, son! You keep that long hair!
You don’t need to shower either-On the same note, why suffer through that moment when you are wet and naked and it’s extremely cold? You’re not really sweating much at all and you will just cover back up with that super warm, oversized sweater anyway. So skip a couple of days. I am sure no one will even notice.
Your snowman never melted-Remember how you spent hours on that one almost freezing day and constructed the perfect snowman. During a normal winter you might get a day out of it before the melting began. First the carrot nose would fall off. Then an arm would get droopy. By the mid afternoon, with the full sun blazing down, the head would shrink until it finally fell right off. Well, not this year! If you took the time to make it, it’s still there! In fact, it probably, somehow increased in size and durability. It’s really been that kind of winter.
So go grab your favorite sweater and blanket, curl up with your favorite saved show with your super hot Biggby coffee and say a Hallelujah that you aren’t swatting the one random mosquito that decides this is the best time to bite you.